Routine Has Happened

I was sitting her on the couch browsing the internet (yeah I know so healthy and all) and I realized something......I finally have routine with my healthy lifestyle!  I was telling a friend of mine how I always heard it takes 30 days to make something a habit.  That is a load of BS! 

I can't tell you how many times I attempted to turn my life around.  I would stick with things for MONTHS and go right back to where I started.  I don't know what the difference is now compared to then, but it just feels right!

It feels weird if I don't work out during the week (especially my PT sessions).  If I don't eat well, by body tells me so!  Like seriously, it makes me miserable....absolutely miserable!  My body craves exercise!  It's like a drug!  A huge antidepressant drug!  I am more positive and my body is happy!

I cried today at my Personal Training (PT) today.  I felt so stupid but I cried!  I was doing a circuit and part of it was a "chin up" move where I squatted to the floor and used my arms to pull up and down.  Immediately I started crying.  My trainer seriously thought I was hurt and that something was terribly wrong with me.  All I could say was "I never would have thought I'd be able to do something like this before".  All he said was "Well, you're doing it now!".  Damn right Tommy!  Damn right!

My trainer is amazing.  (that's my sweaty PT selfie) Super patient but very firm and motivating.  Pushes me to the point that my body can take the work out but, as he said today, "I don't push you to the point that you can't even sit down on the toilet".  SO TRUE!  When I was at Fitness 19 my trainer (let's call him Bob) would work me out so hard that I literally couldn't sit down on the toilet without something to support me!  He knew I had a knee issue and was worried about building up the strength in my thighs and around my knees.  I'd be out of commission for DAYS!

I am sore with my new trainer, but it is a good sore.  A reminder of what muscles I used for my workout and that I am slimming and trimming that fat away!  A reminder of the old me becoming the new me!  RAWR!!  LoL

Ok, so I love my PT days and they make me happy and healthy like my healthy eating!  YAY!  When I miss either of those things, my world comes crashing down and all is lost and gone forever ;)

As a side note, I have signed up for a 5k race every month until October!  I am so happy and so excited because my husband has decided to run with me!  He wants to get into it too!  I am so excited to share this part of my life with him!

Off to bed I go my friends!  Thanks for reading and share this with your friends!  Maybe I can guide someone to a healthier lifestyle too!

~ <3 ~
Me

The Day After

Yeeeeaaaahhhhh WOW am I tired!

I came home yesterday.  I took a shower.  I laid on the couch for a good hour.  I never did take a nap, but just relaxing and stretching was nice.

No lie.....we went to bed at 8pm and I slept hard until almost 6am.....when I woke up I was still tired!  :)

I was pretty tired and a little achy today, but as long as I kept moving I felt pretty good!  I am already thinking of next year.  I am definitely running that again and I am so excited!!!! 

I don't have much to say....I am just enjoying the ride of excitement here!  Thanks for reading everyone!

~ <3 ~
Me

My First 10k!

It is official!  The Rite Aid Cleveland Marathon; Half Marathon; 10k!  Today was my day to add another milestone into my journey.  I'll tell you something....I almost didn't even go.  My anxiety got SO bad yesterday that I really almost decided it would be worse dealing with my anxiety than running at all.  BOY was I glad I stuck it out.

I followed my friend Kelly there and we got there and it was FREEZING!!!  Super windy and freaking cold!  We hopped and stepped around trying to keep our bodies warm as best we could.  The national anthem was sung (by an amazing woman who obviously was a country singer) and off we went.  It took probably 10-15 minutes for us to finally hit that starting line.

Once I hit the line, I was off (and obviously started the timer on my Garmin GPS watch).  Kelly and I had agreed that if one of us fell behind to just keep going and we would meet at the finish line.  At one point I lost her as she weaved through the people and then I was on my own.  Music blaring and feet jogging along the streets of Cleveland.

I kept looking at my wrist seeing how far I had been running and see that 1 mile come up.  "WOW that was fast!"  I was keeping an 11:16 mile and I was happy with that.  Next I hit the 2 mile 11:39 "Ok, pace yourself but speed up a little".  I hit the 3 mile and realize "HOLY CRAP I just ran 3 miles in under 35 minutes!"  It was my best time yet!  The fastest I had ever gone was 35:15 I believe last year.  I hit 4.5 miles and say "Wow I am practically done!" and then 5 miles hits.

As we came back we went over a bridge but most of the way was uphill.  I can't tell you how many times I talked myself out of walking.  I figured I would just slow it down a bit to catch my breath and then pick it all back up again.  I hit 6 and thought "Where the hell is the finish line!?"  That kind of threw me off because Garmin said I went 6.3 miles, but I kept going!


 SO, here comes the finish line...I even feel myself slow up a little bit.  Then BAM!  I run so fast I feel like my legs will fall off or I may puke and I pass up others just to get to that finish line!

Here is my official time from the chip on my racing bib.  I have to say I did better than I thought I would!  When running at home I did 1:27 and that included me walking a bit up some pretty steep hills.  I couldn't be more happy with the time.  In all honesty, I am just glad I never stopped to walk!

As I was going through my info on Map My Fitness and looked at the break down of my miles, at some points it says I was doing like a 9 minute mile (must have been those downhill moments while I caught my breath).  Either way I couldn't believe I had done it and that I had made it!

I finished strong, grabbed a water, grabbed my banana and sat down in the grass to stretch it out!  I met back up with Kelly (who did amazing btw beating me with her time!) and we just sat and of course took our post race SELFIIIIIEEEEE!!!

Why can I never just smile....I have to make these ridiculous freaky faces.  Anywho, We walked back to the cars and I got in and headed home.  I was so thankful she was there to help me with my anxiety.  I told her she probably thinks I am a psychopath....but she ran with me anyways ;)

I was able to run into some family and friends at the race and everyone did amazing!!  I was glad I completed my goal of fully running a 10k.  No stopping, 6.2 (Garmin said 6.3) miles, showing the world what one can accomplish when we are determined and when we put our mind (and body) to the test!

So, thank you Kelly for not weirding out on me and being an amazing friend!  Hey remember when we used to play soccer together on our co-ed team!?  Life brings you back together for a reason and YOU my friend really helped me today!

I am so blessed and thankful and proud of myself for what I was able to do.  Again showing others what can be done when you want to change your life into a healthy and active one!

This will be the longest I ever would want to run, so no, I am not going to train for a half marathon or full marathon.....I am totally ok with my 10k!  Maybe one day I will change my mind, but for now I am all good ;)  Thanks for reading and have an amazing weekend everyone!  I am relaxing and then will be celebrating my birthday with my in-laws today.  Keeping it low key before I hit the big 32 tomorrow!  EEP!

~ <3 ~
Me

A NSV (Non Scale Victory) For Today

My official NSV (Non Scale Victory) for soon to be summer 2014????  My running tanks that I bought and wore last summer are too big!  I wore one tonight to run a quick mile before nasty weather hit us yet again here.  I was so excited!  Also relieved because I like a looser fitting top when I am running because nothing shifts and moves around on me.

I came home from work and immediately changed my clothes and hit the pavement!  It got as warm as the upper 80's and was muggy as all get out so I decided to kick in a mile and be happy with that.  It was a quick mile!  I was pretty happy with it :)

So, tomorrow is PT day with Tommy and I am glad!  After that I am taking it pretty easy until my 10k Sunday!  AHHHHH!

~ <3 ~
Me

No Running Tonight

I had planned on running lightly this week to keep preparing for my 10K on Sunday.  It was raining most of the day, but I was prepared to do a quick mile in the rain.  I get home and BAM thunderstorm....and it's still going on....There is always tomorrow and I know I will get my cardio in wednesday after training then it's time to relax until Sunday.

I plan on having a big spaghetti dinner Saturday night and then a BBQ after my 10k.  I pretty relaxing weekend other than my 10k day!  Super nervous but super excited to get it done and cross something else off my list of accomplishments!  I may not be the fastest, but I am going to finish darn it!

~ <3 ~
Me

Weekend Eating

So Monday through Friday my eating is pretty reigned in.  Saturday comes and it goes crazy.  I think it's because of routine.  When I am at work, I have a routine.  What my breakfast is, what my snacks are, what my lunch is and the times during the day that I eat them.

With the weekends I wake up later and am tempted because I have more time and I want to have a bigger breakfast.  I forget my snacks and then I have a huge lunch.  I am sitting here at 1:30 pm already fearing what I will have for dinner because we don't have it figured out.  I just know that I need to have my snack around 3:00 pm so my body doesn't totally freak out on me.

Do any of you have recommendations on maintaining over the weekends with your healthy eating?  I mean I don't keep myself from enjoying food, but because I am still so tempted, it is hard to have self control.  I have been keeping pretty strong today knowing that I probably would have a higher calorie dinner.  Blah! 

I am excited though because I got a protein powder supplement.  Someone had recommended it to me and I mentioned it to my trainer and he agreed that it would be a good idea.  The day I decided that I saw an advertisement on Facebook (usually they are stupid) for an Organic, GMO-Free supplement.  I am so excited to start using it because my protein intake is non existent other than some chicken in my salad.  I am hoping this gives my body the boost it needs to help with building muscle and burning the fat.  It is called Natural Grade Nutrition - Whey Protein Isolate  I will keep you posted!

Just wanted to vent because I was already freaking out and needed to share it with someone ;)

~ <3 ~
Me

Welcome Year TWO!

Well, I have begun my second year of my lifestyle change.  Not only am I impressed that I even made it this far (by a thread) but how motivated I still am to continue doing better!

I celebrated my one year healthy lifestyle anniversary Monday by going for a run.  It felt amazing and I really maintained a great pace throughout a 3 mile run.  I kept around 11:30-ish most of the time which I was impressed with because I haven't been able to do that since last year after finishing my 5k training.

My husband started a healthy eating regimen for work because they are having a competition on who can lose the most in a few months I guess.  Him doing that has made SUCH a huge difference.  We don't have as much junk in the house and we are eating a ton of healthier stuff.

I made the venture into the world of GMO free and Organic food last weekend.  I am trying to really pay attention to what we are buying and what we are putting in our bodies.  I figure I had one year of working out.....now it is time to focus on food.  This is my first week and it has been going QUITE well!  We have been eating a ton of grilled chicken, organic products and I have been aiming at getting GMO free as well.  It is so overwhelming but I am trying to get it slowly but surely.

I have had friends in my past that would really get going about organic stuff but at that time I wasn't ready.  Hell, my life was full of chaos, depression, really bad crap and I wasn't even thinking of my own health at that point.  Well, now it is time, and I have one heck of a support system around me to guide me and help me.

This handy little label has really helped me in my search....and yes if I see it I will buy your product over one without it.  There is just so much I can do and change and yet so much TO change that I feel overwhelmed and sometimes don't know where to begin....but so far so good!  Baby steps!

I had my PT training yesterday and for the first time I can say I feel like death LOL  He did an AMAZING job working my upper body!  Afterwards I went and did 6 miles on the elliptical machine.  I am pooped!  However I still went and ran almost 2.5 miles today with our doggy.  I had to walk the last .5 because she was starting to limp :(  Poor gal!

Ok I need to get some sleep and rest up for a busy work day and another PT Session!!!

Thank you all for your support from my one year blog posts!  I chuckle because my typed out post where i poured my heart out had like 38 views and my photo blog was like 115 or something BAHAHA.  I mean I am honored you all want to see my scary pictures but don't forget the emotional changes that can happen during this journey.  You're right though....even I can't stop staring at them LOL!

Thanks again for all of your support and bring it on YEAR 2!!!

~ <3 ~
Me

My 1 Year Journey Through Photos

I figured I would post my journey through photography so you can all see what I have tried to accomplish in 12 months!  I hit my lowest weight of 174 lbs in September.  I gained 6 lbs over Thanksgiving and Christmas.  I was with a trainer at Fitness 19 for over a month but wasn't really seeing any results.  I switched to Tommy Salvatore at YDM Fitness in April and in just a short period of time I have gained 10 lbs since my lowest weight, but I noticed going through my photos today that I am really starting to slim down quite a bit.

It was a hard decision to post these personal photos of myself, but people needed to see what can be accomplished!!

November 2011 - 200 ++ lbs

May 2013 - 203 lbs

June 2013

July 2013

August 2013

September 2013 - 174 lbs

May 2014 - 183 lbs

Side By Side Comparison!

The sports bra I am wearing is the SAME in both pictures, so you can see the difference!  I am still shocked!

~ <3 ~
Me

One Year Ago

One year ago a family friend helped change my life forever.  I no longer wanted to be THAT person.  I wanted to live life and enjoy it.  I wanted to get off my lazy ass and be with my family.  I wanted the energy so that when my kids wanted to run around and play I didn't say "Mommy is tired" or "Mommy doesn't feel good".  Seeing the disappointment in their faces and hearing their sighs......that is something I never want to go back to.

In my journey I have had my ups and downs....My weight has still fluctuated and even after the holidays I haven't gotten back into that groove.  I am working on it but just haven't gotten there yet.  The way the old me felt....I don't wish that on anyone....EVER!  No one should ever go through life feeling the way I did.

I felt like I didn't matter.  I felt like I wasn't a priority and that I wasn't important.  I felt worthless.  I felt ugly.  I felt fat.  I was itching in the skin I was wearing and somewhere deep down in me I still had a voice telling me I could do it if I wanted to.  There isn't a moment that goes by that I don't FEAR going back to that old "Me".  I am petrified.  I have seen friends and family struggle....do well and go back.  Maintaining is what I fear.  It is my own fault for not sticking with my healthy eating.  These feelings of self loathing weren't caused by anyone other than my inner feelings about myself...but as my health got better, so did my attitude.

It isn't just about me now though.  I need to get my family healthy.  This yearly journey I have lost 24 lbs and as of today have only lost under 20 total.  I have been changing things up and started seeing an amazing trainer who has really been pushing me and giving me different things to try fitness wise.  I notice I am slimming down so I am praying it's muscle I am building.  STILL my eating needs reigned in a bit.

I have learned so much in a year and have made such amazing life long friends and connections as well as growing closer with those around me.

To my Mom and Dad....thank you!  Your motivation means the world to me and your support has been incredible.  All of your advice Mom has been so amazing and I am so blessed to have you in my life....FOREVER ;)

To my husband Ryan....you have allowed me to take time for ME and focus on ME.  I love you so much and it grows stronger everyday.  You truly are my rock and support and I wouldn't be able to do this without you backing me up 100% (even if you do ice cream runs sometimes) You have motivated me and even when I was at my lowest you always made me feel beautiful and loved.  You truly are my soul mate and you are stuck with me babe <3

To my children....your existence has motivated me to become a healthier Mommy so that I can be here and stay strong through whatever life throws at me.  I want to be there through your milestones and see your children grow one day.  You are the reason Mommy changed....to be around....to be your Mommy!

To Yurisa...Our friendship has pulled me through some dark times and motivated me through the bright times.  You have helped me gain confidence in other ways to help me in my journey.  Your shoulder to cry on and your ears for listening have saved me more than you know.  I am so blessed that you are a part of my life even though I wish it would have been sooner than it was.  You are an amazing and strong woman and your friendship to me words cannot describe how much it means to me.  BFBFL <3

To Eva....having your friendship and support has been priceless!  You keep me in line and motivate me with your own journey.  No matter what the future holds I do hope that our friendship stays true and strong.  Thank you for everything.

To Sarah....Your recommendation of couch to 5k is what got me going and all of your fitness and food support has been amazing.  Thank you for taking the time to spend guiding me and helping me through this journey.  I feel like I harass you so much but you are so kind and thoughtful and amazing.  You were with me the first time I ran 3.1 miles at home and I will never forget it!

To my trainer Tommy....Not that you will read this...maybe you will.  I know our time together has been short, but your confidence in me and the ability to know how I function has been so helpful...here is to many more weeks of training and changes!

To my barefoot shuffling friend, Karen....I know you are always there for me to get me off my butt and out on the road!  Thanks for keeping me motivated!

To Joyce....You truly helped me realize that this was what I needed to do.  I am so thankful!  Because of what happened, you truly saved my life!  I am forever grateful and blessed that you helped me realize what I was doing to myself and helped me start my journey.

I know I am forgetting people.....to all of my friends to read this or share it or just listen to me vent...thank you!  When I hear someone say "You motivated me" I still can't believe I could do that for someone but I am so blessed that I am able to help others through my journey as others have helped me.

Happy 1 year of a changed lifestyle and here is to at least 40 more ;)

Milestones:
Lost 20lbs
Ran my first 5k 9/15/13 in 35:17
Ran my second 5k 10/13/13 in 35:13

Will be running my first 10k May 18th!!

 BEFORE     203 lbs

NOW   183 lbs

~ <3 ~
Me