Ahhhhhhh....Smell That Sunshine

I was SO excited when a friend of mine asked me to go running with her today!  The sun was out, it was cold, but warm enough to pump the blood through my body!  I ran home and got into my outside cold running clothes and drove to the local metropark!

Now I am sure while we were running I felt as though I looked like the women to the right there.  The first mile for me is ALWAYS the hardest!  I always know when I go over 1 mile because it just gets so easy to run!  We had decided to run 4 and walk the last mile JUST in case my knee decided to become a literal pain.

Two miles go by and I am fairly close to my running buddy!  I have to say for not running past the 3 mile mark since November I felt like I did fairly well for myself!  We get to the end of the road and start back up again heading back to our cars.  We hit mile 3 and I give a hearty "YEAAAAAH".  The gentleman passing us thought it was amusing and laughed at me, but HEY!  I was so excited!

Now, by this point I felt like I looked like this guy to the left here LoL.  I was getting tired and my knee was feeling sore as was my shin!  WHAT THE HECK!  It was always past that 3mi mark that my knee bothered me before Thanksgiving.  BUT, I kept going!

Finally we got to the 4 mi mark and I was glad because my knee was screaming!  SO, we walked the last mile back to the cars and that was it!  I felt AMAZING!  I did 4 miles pretty much non stop with just a few seconds of a walking break.  We went up hills and down hills!  I am sure I am going to be sore tomorrow, but what are you gonna do?  Right?

I can't wait to keep going with my 5k-10k training because right now it seems impossible to run 6 miles!  I know by the end of my 9 weeks I will have it down, but it makes me nervous!  What if I can't do it!  I don't want to hit the time limit and just be done!  I know this all sounds so negative, but it's what I have been thinking of lately!

Ok, I have karate class tonight depending on how my knee feels and then it's home to relax and sleep :)  Thanks for reading and thank you to my barefoot shuffling friend who made my run possible today!  So much better than the gym!!

~ <3 ~
Me

Don't Piss In The Wind

Or spit for that matter!  So one icky thing with running is that I get REALLY flemmy.  Like mucus is suffocating me.  So, I read online to make sure you spit.  For me, if I don't, I will physically be sick at the end of my run.  SO, I have learned to spit quite well.

HOWEVER!  I went for a run this morning.  The weather here in Northeastern Ohio is AMAZING right now.  A bit off topic, but I have been running outside a lot.  ANYWHO!  I get to a point where I am having a hard time breathing and swallowing, so I hocker one up and spit into the street.  I was MORTIFIED when this woman runs up right behind me.  I probably almost spit on her if she didn't get at least a misting.

I was SO embarrassed and apologized.  She just smiled and said "Good Morning" after her horrified look that she almost got nailed in the face.  I seriously couldn't believe I had done that.  Why didn't I look?  OH WELL!  She passed my slow ass right up and kept on going.

Other than that awful event, my run was so nice!  I ran 4.5 miles and walked the remaining to hit just over 5 miles.  Felt great!  I am super sore, but I burned like 800 some calories!  So, I use My Fitness Pal to track my food and my fitness.  I have a Garmin Forerunner GPS (purchased it with a company called Hear Rate Monitors USA) watch which I use with a heart rate monitor.  I love it because it takes into consideration my weight, distance, and my heart rate to figure out calories burned.  I knew I had to have burned quite a few because the course I took was pretty steep with some inclines, so it gave me a good work out.  I wasn't going for speed.  I just wanted to do 4 miles and I passed that! 

This honestly has been the best thing I purchased when I started running.  Yes, the clothes are nice, and my Fitbit One is amazing with tracking steps.  BUT, I like exact measurements and this item makes me so happy!  I recommend one to everyone!  I sync it with a website I joined (for free) called Map My Run.  Amazing website and if you don't have the Garmin, or another device to sync with it, you can figure out your course on their website and it will tell you everything you need or want to know! 

The combination of the two of them has helped me immensly.  I like graphs and maps.  Most of all I like knowing exactly how far I have gone and how many calories I have burned.  I like numbers.  Numbers show progress.

It's amazing looking back when I started in the beginning of May 2013 and could barely do that mile.  PLUS that was a combination of running and walking with my Couch to 5k App.  Looking back it seems silly that I couldn't do it.  HOWEVER!  I was a 203 lb almost 31 year old woman of two children that hadn't stuck with a damn thing dealing with my health and exercise.  Now I am down 26 lbs and am feeling amazing.  I have my moments of back tracking, but I find my way back because I miss it!

I honestly can say that I REALLY enjoy running.  I wouldn't say love....quite yet....but I am getting there!  When I don't run I feel run down and tired.  When I run I feel energized and so much better ab out myself!  One of the ladies I worked with made me chuckle!  I brought my running clothes to work Wednesday last week for a VERY cold run around the office.  She looked at me and said "Look at you!  You really are a runner now!". 

She was right!  I don't dread running.  I don't hate it.  I don't say "Oh I hate running.", "I'll only run if something is chasing me.".  NOPE!  I am a runner.  It feels amazing and I enjoy running.  It is a part of my life now and it makes me happy.  Thank you May of 2013 and what you changed in me and for me.  I couldn't imagine my life any other way.  Well, other than maybe winning the lottery or something :)

AMEN!

~ <3 ~
Me

Starting Over....

I am starting fresh tomorrow!  I plan on running during my lunch.  All i wanna do is 2 miles.  If I can do 3 that'd be awesome.  I may go tonight.  I may just do a Sunday night!  That way I won't feel like I am driving to and from work so many times a day to go to the gym.

That has been the hardest thing for me.  It was so easy to just change up after the kids were in bed and go out running.  I REALLY need a treadmill.  I could run every night and it would be amazing.  I just want a nice used one.  That's all I ask!  Even if someone has one they don't use.  Maybe I could BORROW it until I can save up for my own :)  I really enjoy the treadmill and then I would be in my own home running whenever I want.  After bed time or even during naptime for my kids! 

Well, tomorrow is a new day and I am starting over.  I haven't been eating well and I haven't been working out.  I am so angry with myself.  I have to get back to it!

~ <3 ~
Me

Support Systems

It is motivational Tuesday for me!  I am trying to find some push to get my ass moving.

Today's topic I really wanted to post something about support systems.  I have said before that you won't make life changes until you are ready.  Until every aspect of your life is ready.  That includes a  strong and steady support system.

If you don't have a strong support system, the people around you can sabotage all efforts to improve your life.  All is takes is one negative nelly to ruin your efforts.  Especially in the beginning!  For me, I am still weak.  I have only been at this for 5 months and I am STILL weak!  It takes a brief second for me to cram a cookie in my mouth.  To have that extra scoop of pasta.  To eat that extra slice of bread.

I still have people say "Oh just have one", "If you have a little it won't matter".  What they don't realize is that ONE or that LITTLE bit can ruin me!  In a brief moment of weakness I can cave and THAT snowballs for the rest of my day!  I know not all people realize this, but when I say no.....I mean NO!  Stop offering me snacks KNOWING I can't have them.  Stop egging me on to eat that one tiny bite when you know I can't do it.

If your support system that surrounds you just can't accept the fact that you are changing your lifestyle and trying to improve your life.  You need to sit them down and put it all out there.  Tell them that you need their support and encouragement.  That when you don't eat a certain thing, or don't have that piece of cake; there is a reason!  If they choose to laugh or make light of your decisions....screw them!  They are selfish and you don't need to put up with their crap.  You also don't have the time!!

You need to surround yourself with people who when you decide to MAKE that change, will support you 100%!  When you go to grab that cookie or eat a piece of cake they will have no hesitation speaking up because you asked them to.  They will tell you "It's ok.  You can do it tomorrow".  They will congratulate you when you've done well and they will lift you up when you are feeling down.

I have many support systems.  My husband and kids, my parents (hearing them say how proud they are of me makes me want this even more), family, friends (all of my readers and friends who post supportive comments here and on Facebook).  I also have my online support system.  My My Fitness Pal friends are amazing!  When I have a bad day they help me see why and what NOT to do tomorrow.  My fellow co-workers for the most part are very understanding.  Every once and awhile people offer me food when I am not asking for it.  They will learn :) 

My one co-worker and I (I feel) have grown closer through our lifestyle changes together.  We compare our steps everyday.  We look at each others online food journals.  She really has been a motivator (she has lost a TON of weight) and such a support system for me!  Thanks Eva!  You have been wonderful!  Thank goodness I love my job so that I never leave.  We shall be healthy forever :)

So, thank you to MY support system.  You keep me going when I don't feel like I can, and you are always there through the "thick and thin" of my journey.  Love to you all and thank you!!!

~ <3 ~
Me

Feeling Like A Blowfish

This is how I am feeling today!  After a crazy busy weekend of fun and food, THIS is how I am left to feel.  We had a yummy spaghetti dinner last night with garlic bread.  The indigestion I had from it kept me up all night.  I woke up this morning feeling so sick!  I had to go in later to work today and knew I had time to go running and was DREADING it! 

However, I packed my stuff, took the kids to their sitter and headed to the gym super early in the morning.  I got to see the sun rise while I was running...kind of neat :)  So I start running and think to myself "2 miles is all I am going to be able to do....I feel like my stomach is going to explode upward or downward and I don't want to be in public when that happens."  You know what I did?  I took my "sweat towel" and draped it over the read out screen on the treadmill and just kept looking out the window.  I wipe my face and notice I have already gone a mile!  "What's one more"  I am there already right?  May as well make it worth it!  I look down again and see 2.5 miles.  "Well I guess I will go to 3.1...I am almost there."  I hit 3.0....feeling a little sick to my stomach I scream at myself "It's only one more mile you pansy!"  So I kept going.  I walked for maybe 1 minute and then when I hit 3.95 I slowed down to walk out the end of my run.

I felt great.  I still feel a little nauseous and have some stomach cramping, but it is AMAZING how something like food can wreck you like that!  One thing I have learned is that my body is used to how I have been eating.  Lots of protein, fruits, healthy snacks.  SO, when I do cheat or have a little too much of something I pay for it!  I don't like it!  When it's there I have no self control.  This weekend made me realize that. 

My biggest fear right now is the holidays coming up!  I need to start plotting my meals now!  We eat with two families usually each day.  I need to make sure I enter my food ahead of time on My Fitness Pal so that I don't stray.  When I plan it out, it makes it so much easier to stick with it!

I have my second 5k this coming Sunday.  My Mom is running it with me which I am so excited about!  She hasn't been feeling well and has been fighting this nasty cough, so she is hoping she will be able to run it with me!  I am nervous yet again.  I am more than sure there are some BIG hills I will be running on, but I am excited also!  I may get to meet one of my MFP (My Fitness Pal) friends there as she will be running as well!  After that 5k I will be done with them until the spring while I continue my running all winter long!

Well, thanks for reading!  I really have been slacking on writing, but things have been busy here!  Never a dull moment in the life of a Mommy right!?  Everyone have an AMAZING Monday!  Make your goals for the week and stick with them!  Anything is possible!

~ <3 ~
Me

Holy Moly!!!!

This, my friends, is how I felt this morning after finishing my run.  I ran NON-STOP (well I walked 2mins at the end of my run) for 3.50 miles!  I was so happy!  I kept telling myself not to look at my distance.  Why?  Because as soon as I would hit that 3.1 I knew I would be a lazy ass and start slowing down and walking.  I am pretty good with knowing when I will wuss out on things and THAT was one of those moments.  My legs are sore, but a good sore  I have been doing a lot of stretching since I got back.  It felt good to get out in the sun.  There is a nice breeze off the lake today so it was the perfect balance of cool and warm.  Great running weather today!

One of the things I have a hard time with is change.  I have posted about my anxiety about un-known things and hopefully didn't make myself sound like a lunatic.  HOWEVER, today was HUGE!  I ran out of our development and down the main road to to my "course" today.  I needed a change and it was just what I needed!  My first goal to accomplish on this way is to be able to run past the ice cream shop and back home....probably a good 6 miles maybe?  The way I would run anyways...if we drove we'd take the quick way and be there in no time :)

Anyway, it felt great!  I was on the pavement feeling the gravel.  Sidewalks tend to bore me and almost are more of a work out and are more exhausting just because they vary going up and down SO much!  I can't wait to accomplish this goal!  I have to map it out on map my run and see how many miles it is!

Fall is here, which means winter is close behind, so I am preparing myself to begin running at the gym.  I have to keep after myself so that I don't take the easy way out for me and do an elliptical.  I am nervous yet excited knowing that I can continue my journey without any interruption on the way.

My next item on the list is weight training.  I REALLY need to get into gear because as I am losing weight, I am getting floppy.  Floppy arms, floppy thighs, floppy tummy.  I gotta tighten all of that up before it starts just sagging there like a piece of road kill. :)  I wish I had a friend close by that did weight training that could take me twice a week to my gym and (for free) just guide me with what to do.  I've never properly used gym equipment other than an elliptical machine.  So, A) there are random men also using the machines and B) I don't want to do something and hurt myself.
So, now I need to get ready for my day of work!  No one wants a stinky lady cleaning their teeth ;)

~ <3 ~
Me

Props to fox1047 for the image that I took off Deviant Art

Feeling "Bleh" Today

Some days I realize I need to vent and writing on here really helps scare the blues away.  Today is one of those days.  It's gloomy outside with the impending rain (which we need) and I start later at work today.  I am up and about trying to clean the house and do laundry.  I am just not feeling it today!

I am very nervous about my upcoming 5k on Sunday.  I am excited to get to the finish line but I am still nervous.  I clam up and freak out around large groups of people and unfamiliar situations.  I am thankful that a friend will be near me.  He convinced me to do the race!  Still, I am nervous.  I really want to do well on time but I don't want that to be going through my mind while I am running.  In reality I just want to finish the race without feeling like death :)

Yesterday at work was a bit awkward.  There was a small situation with someone there.  I don't like confrontation and enjoy living in my happy bubble where there is no hate....only fluffy clouds and unicorns!  It really rattled my bones.  I don't know why I let stuff stay with me and bother me.  Our office consultant once said "I don't make you feel a certain way.  It is how you make YOURSELF feel when you interpret it".  That is so true!

I really take things personally.  I may not show it when it happens but it sticks with me for quite awhile.  It could be a little jab at me or something to poke fun.  I will laugh and make my quick come back, but unfortunately, I am still sensitive.  I feel like I always had a high self esteem to keep myself up when maybe I didn't have the friends in school, or when I did get picked on.  As an adult.....it's EXHAUSTING!  People tell me I need to speak up and say my mind and when things hurt or bother me to say something.  I am trying.....still growing.....still learning.

My problem is I have such an open heart.  I take everyone in and when something happens to crush that "perfect" thought I am devastated!  So anywho, yesterday at work really rattled me.  My boss is amazing and supported me which I am so thankful for!  He really is an amazing boss....I am very lucky to have landed where I am today.  So, why am I still letting it bother me?  Who knows...I hate it.  I need to pray or meditate or something.  As I get older my anxiety is getting worse.

On the days that I run,  I feel amazing.....maybe I need to start running everyday?  It's my own personal antidepressant/anti-anxiety treatment!  A doctor I USED to see (notice the past tense) tried to put me on an antidepressant for my anxiety and I was a ZOMBIE for at least a month.  I took myself off of it when I realized I was falling asleep in the middle of the floor while I was playing with my kids.  I have to admit that my job then was emotionally and physically draining (mainly due to the boss I had).  Once I found another job that helped 300% and then my running has really given me an outlet.  My Dad keeps telling me to come back to Karate.  I miss it....the physical contact of hitting shit really made me feel great.  I was really involved in high school and it helped me stay fit, flexible, and strong!

I really don't know where this entry is going.  But I figured if I type it out and put it out there....I'll feel better for venting and my readers always offer great support.  I have been reading blogs out there and it is amazing seeing other peoples journeys through their weight loss and healthy living.  So inspiring.  One that resonated was a recent post HERE about how people judge others who are overweight and how they feel about it.  Such an amazing perspective.  I am guilty of it too.  Trying to put on a happy face when inside you are screaming....read up.  It is amazing!

Ok, so don't be worried about me from this post.  I am FINE.  I just needed to vent.  My husband gets an earful of my venting and I figured he needed a break ;)

As a side note, it was freaking HOT yesterday and I decided to go running at 1:30pm....yeah not so smart.  I walked a lot because I started getting chills around my lips and up my spine.  Always freaks me out when it's super hot out and while I am a sweaty mess I start shaking because I am cold....NOT good!  I tried to re run my wk2 day 2 in my 5k-10k app and failed at beating my previous time.  I wasn't surprised just because of the weather conditions.  But I did it until the end and then went further to make sure I finished that 3.1 mi!!!  I run tomorrow again....I may go today.  Just for a mile as a time check to help with my time for Sunday......AHHHH SUNDAY!!!  :)


My Fitbit is great.  The woman at work and I were hard core competing and I gave up.  She always beats me in steps.  But when I run my 3mi I try to burn more calories rather than look at the steps I have.  It always makes me smile when I do hit my 10,000/day though!  I feel like I accomplished something!  Here is a screen shot of my day yesterday.

Pretty good I think!  My best day was like 15,000 something.  That was a day I ran AND cut the grass :)  I felt amazing that day.  SUPER exhausted the next day but still great :)  Can't wait to see how I do today!

Well, enough procrastinating.  I have GOT to get some stuff done today!!  Have an amazing day everyone and thanks so much for letting me vent!  I feel so much better :)

~ <3 ~
Me

My Addiction To Food

I would be lying if I said I wasn't thinking about eating a doughnut until I saw this picture......YUUUUM!

So I have said it before and I will say it again.  I think food is the DEBIL and yet I can't live without it.  It isn't even that I love ALL food....just the ones that aren't good for me.  If it is near me, I will eat it.  I will take a bite which leads me to come back later for another bite, then another.  I end up eating half of what is there, but make sure I time my snacking so no one sees me and no one would know it was ME who ate it all.

Since I have started my journey in May, I have REALLY been keeping track of my eating on My Fitness Pal .  I keep my diary open so EVERYONE can see it.  For some reason it helps with my guilt factor.  Meaning if I eat awful, everyone will see it and judge me and persecute me to no end about my awful horrible choices.  They aren't mean at all and everyone is so supportive, so that has helped me a ton.

Growing up, my Mom always made amazing dinners.  Casseroles, home made spaghetti, chicken, pork chops.  We were never allowed sugary cereals.  It was Cheerios, Rice Krispies, Kix, or Rice Chex.  She is an A-MA-ZING cook.  As far back as I can remember I was always a picky eater.  My Mom and Dad would make me sit at the table until I at least ate ONE BITE!  Just one!  I was so dramatic. 

I hate the taste of chicken, pork, steaks.....I HATE it!  I won't eat chicken unless it is in a wrap or a bun (cut in super tiny pieces).  I refuse to eat steak or pork chops.  I WILL eat pulled pork.  The only veggie I will eat is carrots and they need to be dipped in some type of dressing.  I do love fruits though.  A LOT!  I love my carbs.  Pasta, pizza, bread.  I love breakfast foods and cereals :)

I wish I would have learned to love foods more so that I could cook for my family better.  So that I, MYSELF, would eat what is made.  It's like I'm sabotaging my children before they even have a choice of what they do or do not like to eat.  They do love all of their veggies though.  That has made me happy, and YES I buy them a ton of it :)

Any advice for helping me with this huge issue???  I don't know if it's the textures or the actual tastes...I've tried eating them prepared multiple ways.  Nothing helps and I just can't do it!  Help!!

~ <3 ~
Me

Proof of Losing

I have been DREADING this post for awhile.  I was nervous, scared, excited, proud.  SUCH a mixture of emotions I just didn't know if I should even do it!  BUT, here it is!

 May 2013 - 200 lbs - lazy, tired, exhausted.  I felt awful about my body and had nothing to wear!

This is today; September 2013 - 180 lbs - active, running, energetic, confident.  I am still not comfortable with my body, BUT I feel better about it :)

A lot of my weight is in my stomach/hips/thighs.  I recently joined a gym for winter time and I plan on running my 3x a week, but also doing weights 2x a week.  They offer one free training session that I PLAN on taking advantage of.  Or finding someone to help me while I am there!

The after picture just makes me smile.  If you could see my face in these pictures, you can see my expressions.  the 200 lb me was frowing....slouching....sad.  You could just see how miserable I was.  And as the pictures have progressed (I have slacked at doing my monthly photos, but have tried) I can see the change.  I stand up straighter, my smile is wider.  I am more confident!

So again....thank you to ALL who have been so supportive!  I run my first 5k in one week and I would be lying if I didn't say I was PETRIFIED!  I don't do well in unfamiliar places.  My anxiety kicks in full force!  It starts at 10:30 am but we have to register at 8:30am....I don't want to wait!  LoL

Wish me luck, and YES I will have pictures to share.  Have a great Sunday everyone!

~ <3 ~
Me

A Huge Milestone Today!!!

WHAT!?  Am I reading this right!?  Is my scale playing it's mind tricks on me again!?

NOPE!  I got on the scale this morning and BAM!  I was down 2 lbs!  I have finally hit my halfway point!  I lost 20 lbs.  I got rid of 20 lbs of self hate, depression, and un-healthyness.  I NEVER want to go back there ever again!!

Thats just under what our son weighs!  I got rid of a small child in weight!  I have gotten close at times to this, but it happened quickly and then i gained it back.  This time I have worked hard and stuck with a plan.  I do have an amazing support system.

My husband has been amazing while I ditch him in the evenings to go out running.  My Mom and Dad have been super supportive.  I can't even begin to tell you all the friends that have been a huge support with all of this.  Especially my friend Sarah.  She helped drive me in the beginning and helped push me to do things I didn't think I could do.  If you read this girlie....thank you <3

You truly need every aspect of your life to be ready for such a huge change in your life.  Your SELF, your family, your friends.  Thank you all for helping me in becoming the new "Me".  The better and healthier "Me".  The sexier "Me" ;)

I was reading a blog where the woman named her scale.  I shall name mine Johnny after my c25k Zombie trainer.  And after Johnny 5...i LOVE those movies ;)  Althought when it makes me mad, I am sure I will have a few choice names for him teeheehee.

I am having an out of sorts week next week and am hoping to continue the streak of goodness!  Thanks to everyone out there who has been so supportive and hopefully I can help you as you have helped me!

~ <3 ~
Me

Humans never cease to amaze....

"I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear."-Martin Luther King, Jr.

Seriously, the human race never ceases to amaze me.  I was very productive this morning and had time to start my 5k to 10k app.  Off I went.  Feeling good to start my new goal for the day.  As I make my way around our block I hear a faint noise.  I decide to turn down my music to take a listen and I hear a young boy screaming from somewhere "Keep running fatty!  You're so fat!".  I didn't turn around, and I just keep on trucking forward.  It didn't hurt me or my feelings.  It made me agry.  At his parents!

Growing up, we picked on kids.  I was even picked on a bit, but it is NOTHING like the kids these days.  Call it bullying, call it picking on someone.  Whatever you call it, it is wrong.  I don't understand how parents can allow their children to behave like this.  NOW, mind you something to think about is "Where did they learn it from?".  Some can say TV, some can say video games, music.  You know what I say?  PARENTS!  Parents need to start taking responsibility of their children.  Molding them into loving caring human beings.  Faith and religion in their lives is a whole different blog post that I will allow some other daring soul to endure.  I have my feelings and I am sure you all have yours on that as well.

Back on track.  Kids these days are not taught to respect people.  They are rude, vile little things and it saddens me that our children will soon be put into school with these kids.  Now, I know it isn't ALL kids, but wow is it a lot.

So, my PSA for today is.... Parents: Please teach your children about love, and respect.  Teach them to treat others the way they would like to be treated.  Teach them how to TALK to people instead of staring at their phones all the time (yes I am guilty of this and am trying to break the habit for my own kids).  Teach them to strive for goals and successes in life.  Kids these days have no direction and it is because we don't expect things from them any more.  They need responsibility and and expectations.

I know every child is different, but we can teach them how to be nice!  I mean sheesh it is pretty simple!

As a side note, I completed Week1 Day1 of my 5k-10k program and cut our front and back lawn as well.  Lots of steps already from my fitbit!

I have been pretty busy today, but that is good.  I have been a lazy bum the last few days :)  I am loving my Fitbit by the way.  It really let me know that I WASN'T moving as much as I thought I did at work!  It has been amazing.  I am a very visual person, so all of the grafts they use really keep me motivated and keep me seeing how I am doing.  I got mine super cheap on eBay!  Just do a search for a used one!  That's what I did!

Ok, enough of my product placement :)  Have an amazing day and enjoy everything and everyone!  Peace and love my friends.....peace and love ;)

~ <3 ~
Me

Run It Out!

 

Well, this was the result of my run yesterday!  I had to get out there and do it already.  I have gone twice for just 1mi to work on my speed/time.  I started at 10:40 and the second time I did 10:38 I believe.  I also have been doing some biking with my kids which includes me pulling a small canvas trailer with my almost 30lb son in it. :)

Back on track!  I did 3.1mi in 35:55!  My lowest time by far!  I started at 40:17 and went down to 38:04 as my best.  I can't believe I shaved almost 3 minutes off of my time!  I felt amazing when I got back.  Very sore just because it's been awhile since I ran the full 3.1.  I think I tried to avoid it!

 This was a screen shot from my Fitbit app on my phone.  By the time I went to bed I had over 12,000 steps!!  Now I don't count the "fitness calories" it claculates based on my steps to determine my eating calories.  I just feel like unless my heart rate is up for 20+ it isn't enough to consider.  So I only take into account my TRUE calories burned.  Like my running, or biking, or walking.  I feel like I will over eat.

This is my current BMI.  The day it gets into the green I will be jumping around screaming for joy!  I am just glad to be out of the obese section.  One of the ladies I work with I also became friends with on My Fitness Pal and we were talking about my blog and my Before and Now blog post.  The other ladies at work seemed interested so I showed them my pictures.  Since they see me everyday they notice I'm slimming down, but didn't think I was that big!  It was nice to see responses.

My eating is still a daily struggle.  It will always be.  I am not sure if it will ever get easier or if I will be fighting my cravings and my inner food demons forever.  I am hoping it goes away one day, but until then I guess I just need to stay active.

My next item up for discussion is the start of weight training.  I know I need to do it to tone up and slim down.  I just don't know what to do.  My Mom made herself a list of things to do on the days she doesn't run.  Maybe she will make me a copy :)

Thanks for reading!  What are some of your newest accomplishments.  Whether it be fitness or in life?  Hope you are all doing well and you have a happy, safe, healthy weekend!

~ <3 ~
Me

Little Miss Busy Feet

Yep!  See that?  I have over 10,000 steps going for today!  I am loving my Fitbit !  It is so interesting to see how active I am or am not and when I am most active.  I cannot lie that my FAVORITE part so far is the sleep tracker!  Really interesting to see how I slept last night.

Anywho, today was a busy day!  After the kids went to their babysitters I came home and went NUTS on our house!  I cleaned from floor to ceiling, vacuumed and steamed the floors.  I even ran the steamer over the one room of carpet we have to freshen it up.  I was super sweaty and knew I was burning those fatty pieces I just love so much :)

I know this is supposed to be a blog about my journey but I had to share a personal story.  Our doggy broke her tooth!!  She has to be sedated tomorrow to have it taken out.  Our poor furry baby!

I can't wait until it is over and we can bring her home!

OK, so back on topic.  I had a decent day today.  After my horrible eating yesterday, I won't lie that today was hard!  I felt that familiar pull towards wanting to eat everything i saw today.  Once i was sitting on the couch all I wanted was ice cream.  I was literally screaming at myself in my mind to shut the heck up and deal.  I drank more water hoping that would help.  I still want it....I do! 

I plan on running my 3.1mi again.  I HAVE to get back on track!  I finished my couch to 5k app and just fell off the wagon.  I was doing so good with it too!  I can't give up!  I have come so far!  My official 4 months weigh in/photo shoot takes place soon and I am excited yet nervous.  I see the difference in older pictures but some days I don't feel like I look different.  I don't want to be model skinny with all my breakable bones hanging out.  I just want to look healthy and toned. 

That is where I will leave this post as I plan on getting into my weights and my experience with Jillian Michaels sometime soon.  Have an amazing day or night (depending on where you live) and thank you again for reading!  Loving the support and knowing people are out there!

~ <3 ~
Me

New Found Fitness

I look much happier than her while I am biking, but it makes me smile knowing that the whole family is staying active.  Our daughter is LOVING riding her bike!!!  I am not going to lie that it is a nice change of pace from the running.  I just hope I don't let it go.  It really did help me feel better and really helped relieve stress I was having at the time.

I guess I don't have much to post today.  I felt so motivated yesterday and really produced an inspiring blog post.  I feel like a bum today :-P

I am very anxious to weigh in the beginning of September and take my photo update.  It is me in a bra and panties and I have no shame to share it so you can see the difference too!  Maybe I'll blur my face ;-)

I want to thank those of you who are reading this and PLEASE if you have any questions or have a topic you would like me to post about, don't hesitate to contact me.  I am on Google+, Facebook, and Twitter!  You know that social networking is EVERYWHERE!  Thanks again and I do hope I can help someone out there who may be struggling like I was!

~ <3 ~
Me

My Personal Best

Well, I did it!  I ran tonight. What was different?  I was able to run a mile in 10:40!!!  I stopped twice equaling almost a minute, but I DID IT!!!  My goal is to get faster more than increasing my distance. 3.1 or even 4 miles is plenty. 

I wish I could go back and show my former self and tell her "See!?  This is the life you could have. To feel good. To not be out of breath from playing with the kids. To feel good about yourself in your own skin. Even your kids notice!  Your daughter encourages you to exercise so you can 'be healthy'.  Your husband even noticed how wonderful you look and said something about it!  Your self esteem is up. You are no longer depressed. You have an amazing job that you finally enjoy. You are surrounded by amazing people who love you and who support you. Can't you see that YOU ARE WORTH IT!?"

You know what?  I AM worth it!  For me, my kids, my husband, my family and my friends. To be with them and to enjoy being with them instead of being a bump on a log. Screw that woman. I am so glad to leave those bad things behind. This is MY TIME, and it feels freaking amazing!  I have proven that anyone can do it!  There are no excuses and there will never be the perfect time to change your life. You just have to DO IT!

So, get up off your butts and go for walks with your kids or your dog. Just go alone to have some meditation time to reflect on your day and to thank God for the life you have :). You don't have to start running or walk for miles. Start small and work your way up. You will be amazed at what you can accomplish!

~ <3 ~

Me